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Old 11-26-2017, 07:28 PM   #1
bungo75
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Top Cow Talent Hunt

Any and all help would be appreciated. The following are pages for my Top Cow Talent Hunt submission. The editors suggested that I need to keep the level of detail consistent in my faces and close ups. I think Iíve been looking at these pages too long and need some fresh perspectives. Thank you again for any critiques.

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Old 11-26-2017, 07:31 PM   #2
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Second page

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Old 11-26-2017, 07:32 PM   #3
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Old 11-26-2017, 07:34 PM   #4
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Old 11-26-2017, 07:35 PM   #5
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Old 11-28-2017, 09:26 PM   #6
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It’s interesting that no one has responded to your Pages. I think that they are very well done and show a lot of skill and effort. They do lack a certain amount of energy and excitement that I come to expect from top cow. Kind of like that classic image comics style. Not that that’s required for good comics but when I see top cow that’s what I think of. Anyway this looks like really solid work. You should think about joining our group project that we are discussing over the in creator community forums
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Old 11-29-2017, 08:02 PM   #7
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Thank you. Yeah, my style isnít really your typical Top Cow look. Lol. Top Cow is doing a talent search so I figured Iíd throw my hat in the ring. Iíll definitely check out your group, sounds cool. Thanks again for the comments.
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Old 11-29-2017, 08:12 PM   #8
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I changed the faces from the third page. Made them more realistic in hopes that thatís what the editors were referring to. Lol
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Old 12-01-2017, 08:20 AM   #9
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I like the style.
Some issues on the storytelling.
Some issues with anatomy. Shoulders are very narrow on everybody.
Page one, panels 2, 3, and 4 are very confusing and plenty of tangents.
Page two, panel one, the guy falling pose, it doesn’t read well. Panel four, the girl’s head and shoulder are in odd position. Her neck should be broken at that point. Try to do that pose and see how it feels. There are more but these are more relevant.
But the drawing in general looks good.
Maybe not for Top Cow yet, but good enough for any Indie project.
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Old 12-01-2017, 09:50 AM   #10
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Thanks for taking the time to comment. Sometimes itís hard to see issues when youíve been looking at the pages so long. Lol.
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Old 12-10-2017, 12:59 PM   #11
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You've gone out of your way to instill the sensation of boredom into these pages. I look at them, and I feel virtually nothing.

And that is bad.

I'm not rooting for either side. So, there's no emotinal attachment being made, despite being several pages in.

Your character are emotionally deprived. It doesn't matter if they're getting punche din the stomach, or if they are blowing somebody's head off with a shotgun. Very emotionally underwhelming for the viewer.

Your art is decent. You have some appreciation for instilling your panels with detail. But, you demonstrate a dreadful habit of depriving individual panels of the true artistic glory that should be bestowed upon them.

Your characters feign action. The action doesn't feel real. It isn't brutal enough.
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Old 12-13-2017, 03:22 AM   #12
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Thanks for your honest opinion. I will take that into consideration going forward.
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Old 12-13-2017, 05:58 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bungo75 View Post
Thanks for your honest opinion. I will take that into consideration going forward.
it was a little harsh..but his overall point is there. you can draw for sure.. just some injection of some energy think would help.

still...post more. AND...come join the group project we are doing.

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Old 12-13-2017, 06:39 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Charles View Post
You've gone out of your way to instill the sensation of boredom into these pages.
WTF, dude? I'm sure you could have made your points without that deconstructive extra layer of douchiness. It's not like you win any cool points for that, and I don't think people need to be abused to get their work to be better.

About the art in question, I do agree with some of the points some others have made. It is certainly not bad, but it is rather generic, not kinetic enough, and there's not too much notable about it. At least from my perspective. You get some really cool angles in there, though.

In short, it's not bad work, even if a couple things here and there can be fixed, but it won't stand out in a crowd, and in this day and age, I'm skeptical whether it would turn many heads. I'd work at making the art more exciting.
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Old 12-13-2017, 08:22 PM   #15
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I like these pages. Good shots, clear storytelling. Good drawing.

I think you could pull back on mid shots in general, some awkward crops -- never crop feet, hands nor heads.

Be bold re: muzzle flashes! Don't be afraid to obscure the opening of the barrel (specifically of the shotgun). Gun bursts should be opaque and fiery. I think some of the intensity of the violence (as described by others) is diminished as a result.

Be clear and decisive about your marks re: wounds, blood spatter, steam/smoke; sometimes tight (pg 5) other times indistinct (2.1 and 4.3). Slightly nitpicky.

Stop working on these and do another sample. If you love Top Cow properties do another TC thing but I think you could also plot and draw a 5-7 pg sample featuring exactly the characters that make you excited about comics doing exactly what you want them to do. That enthusiasm will be evident in the work and speak to editors re: your interests, strengths and most likely weaknesses as well. Do a sample every week or two, fast and mean and energetic.

Post more. Keep going!

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