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Old 07-16-2017, 05:03 PM   #1
Marqphillipsp3
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Arrow New Green Lanterns samples!

Hi all,
I'm back to show off some new pages I've drawn! I'd love to know your thoughts!




I'm also available to draw some books! So If you'd like, shoot me an email here! marqphillipsp3@gmail.com

AND

check out my portfolio here!
http://marqphillips.crevado.com/
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Old 07-19-2017, 10:43 AM   #2
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I'd love to hear you guys' thoughts!
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Old 07-20-2017, 01:35 AM   #3
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My thoughts? On your art or your approach?

Your art is good. Your approach is stingy. Allow me to explain.

Clearly, you are a capable artist. The aura around the Green Lanterns on these pages is thick enough to make effective visual use of that super power for the viewer. This particular power tends to be passive, by nature. The weapons and other energy constructs tend to hog the comic book limelight, where Green Lanterns are concerned. That you bothered with the energy aura is a win in the first place, and that you made it adhere and conform to the characters's form, rather than just be a blob of energy surrounding them, is a win in the second place.

Your characters look decent. Now, that index finger protruding prominently in Panel Three of Page One does look rather painful. Was it disjointed, previously? Really, though, that is a small bone to pick, as the pages, overall, grab and maintain my interest. But, then again, I've long been a fan of the Green Lantern Corps, so perhaps I am biased, in that regard.

Your approach is stingy - because you treat this thread to so few examples of your Green Lantern handiwork. You want feedback. You want comments. Yet, three pages. Really?! Is this all that we get?

The quality of your drawing is more than sufficient to attract the casual passerby. Yet, on most forums, whether art forums or text forums, meager content will frequently be met with silence. So, if you want an audience of size and of voice, you would be well served, I think, to treat prospective viewers to a larger selection of visual samples.

Panel Three of Page One gives evidence and provides visual testimony to the fact that panels do not bind you. You're willing to break out of the box - literally! Yet, in a broader sense, how good are you at crafting panels and at tackling panels, conceptually? There's really no way of telling, with such a sparse offering in this one thread.

In this selection of panels and pages, your characters go seriously about their work. So, there's not a lot of variety in facial expressions on display to get a good feel for what you are capable of, in that area of artistic inclinations.

When this thread first displays as I load it in my web browser, Panel One of Page One reaches out to me. My eye eagerly swallows it whole. Yet, all that you're feeding the viewer are pencils. No inks. No colors. Just pencils.

Not that pencils are a bad thing, for that's definitely not the case. But, what the thread viewer is looking at are Green Lanterns that aren't actually green. Well, not yet, anyway.

There's also no lettering, and no narrative boxes, so how much of a story can be digested with what you've brought to the comment party?

The level of neatness in your pencils tells me that you're considerate of your viewer. There's no sloppiness, here. Oh, sure, Panel Four of Page Three features a big beefy muscle on that one lantern, but since his power ring does all of the heavy lifting, I guess that I'm a little bit miffed at why - or how - his arm is bulked up to that degree.

Then again, though, the superhero genre of comic book art is a never-ending Broadway show of the art of exaggeration. Which begs the question of why those circular depictions of energy in panels Three and Four of Page Three are such weak-looking, albeit hyper-neat, depictions? There's no ink nor color to mitigate that, visually, so those two particular energy depictions are my least favorites on these three pages.

In Panel Four of Page Three, that shield-looking energy construct is what, exactly? I like the edges, particularly when comparing them to those circular energy effects on display in close proximity to to, but if it's a shield of some type, it doesn't seem of sufficient size to adequately protect the Green Lantern wielding it. Maybe a smaller sized Lantern in that instance, with an exaggerated shield to better protect him with, might have been a better choice. The angle of it, though, makes me question whether that's a shield, though. Could it be some kind of display screen? From the perspective of telling a story purely through visuals, I don't know what it is supposed to be. So, in that sense, it is a visual fail, for me. It doesn't look bad. I just don't know what it is.

None of the panels on display on these three pages depict a Green Lantern in epic mode. Your art looks good, but can these Lanterns fight? I suspect so, but visually speaking, what you've chosen to treat the viewer to are the equivalent of second rate, watered down depictions of power ring energy on display. Your art grabs my eye, but thus far, at least, it hasn't left my heart racing and my blood pumping. You have the talent, I think, but do you have the will? Willpower is what makes or breaks Green Lanterns, and you're either sandbagging and holding the best pages out of sight, which does a disservice to the Green Lantern Corps, or you lack the willpower to tackle Green Lanterns when they're pressed to their max and fighting like their life depends on it.

And if you're not going to give the viewer that, then why in the Hell are you bothering to draw Green Lanterns for, anyway?

You're a good artist. You're talented. You even seem to have some degree of comprehension about what super powers are for, as a medium of communication all their own. Yet, if you want a bunch of feedback, then your visual samples that you provide should come loaded for bear - and especially when what you are submitting for feedback are sequentials of superheroes in action.

The big panel on Page Two is a nice fly by. It hints that you're capable of seeing bigger and of drawing bigger. Tell me this - what are Green Lanterns? Where do they operate? What are they famous for?

The scale of threats to which they intend tend to be first rate. Green Lanterns protect entire space sectors. So, what that means is that they are real badasses. Not that artists tend to make that immediately obvious and visually manifest when they dare to attempt to draw them, but they have intergalactic notoriety. Yet, on pages One, Two, and/or Three that you've brought to the visual party, what are these two Green Lanterns actually fighting? Nothing, as far as my eye can tell. Maybe that's why the stiff-looking Green Lantern in Panel Two of Page Two is only using a crow bar. Or is that a ski? My initial glance told me that it was a ski. That was my first impression, even though upon closer observation, it appears to be a crow bar.

Really? A crow bar. A Green Lantern's energy constructs are driven by what? Willpower and imagination, right? How many points should we give you for bringing a crow bar to a fight featuring not just one, but two Green Lanterns? Plus, to add insult to injury, it's a small crow bar, compared to the size of many energy constructs that Green Lanterns are known for. Did he not eat hi Wheaties, this morning?

If you're going to draw an energy construct fully constructed, should it be visually impressive or should it just be a visual afterthought, when judged on its own apart from all other elements on the page?

All things considered, and with the understanding that these are the only three pages of your artwork that I am familiar with, I think that you're a much better artist than you are a visual story teller. Here's why I say that. When I look at each panel of each page in the order of appearance, I'm not sure what the story is.

Page One does a great job of grabbing my eye and getting my attention, and it adequately conveys that they are headed somewhere. Page Two sports a nice fly by of an object, and right below that scene they begin fighting or wielding their energy power. Page Three starts with a panel of something, not sure what. Then, they're opening something, not sure what. Then, they're inside something, perhaps that big orb that they did the fly by of. Then, in the last panel of the last page, they are doing something. Taking selfies, perhaps? Admiring themselves in a mirror? Standing around getting nothing done. There doesn't seem to be much room in that final panel for placement of speech balloons, so honestly, maybe the story will end abruptly or be continued in the next issue.

And that sliver of empty white space above Panel Two of Page Three. What's that about? Why not just make that one panel larger? What is the viewer's eye gain in exchange for that injection of empty white space. Yes, artists do that, and yes it is one way to mix it up with the panels. But, in and of itself, that doesn't explain the visual trade off for why you do it in the first place. In fairness, Panel One of Page Three utilizes a similar technique, although it runs vertically whereas the one in Panel Two runs horizontally. Centering wasn't a consideration, clearly. No stars or space debris is in sight in those slivers of white space. I'm just wondering what your reasons for doing it were.
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Old 07-20-2017, 04:50 PM   #4
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That was a big load of nothing Charles Sorry.
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Old 07-20-2017, 05:01 PM   #5
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They look very nice. http://ryanwoodwardart.com/store/ is a great $2 ebook for more dynamic drawing. Need to do that myself. You seem to avoid straight curved lines, making the anatomy seem mushy abit. Check out the "Road of rhythm through figure" on google images.
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Old 07-20-2017, 06:21 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kevinharte36 View Post
They look very nice. http://ryanwoodwardart.com/store/ is a great $2 ebook for more dynamic drawing. Need to do that myself. You seem to avoid straight curved lines, making the anatomy seem mushy abit. Check out the "Road of rhythm through figure" on google images.
Charles: Edit. He doesn't need to know your hopes and fears, only what works and what doesn't.

Kevin: I know what you mean by 'straight curved lines' -- hard to explain -- but I think you're right.

Marq: Good pages! Your figures do feel a bit mushy and I think it's because your marks tend to curve softly and hold steady lineweight. Vary those marks and weights, mix decisive straights with segmented curves.

Storytelling is good, shots are good. Not enough stuff happens. First two pages could be distilled into Pg 1 half splash: Hal and Jon flying toward reader clearly establishing Who & What with some cool environment that tells us Where & When. Use the next 5-7 pages to tell the editor Why they should hire you to draw funny books. Tell sample stories wordlessly, don't leave room for balloons and captions. Use your space wisely, big action moments packed dense with FG/MG/BG happenings -- men, women, clothing & setting changes, special effects and animals, a twist ending if you can -- keep closeups for major emotional changes, maximum impact.

Sample pages are a demo reel. Show them how good you are.

Keep posting! Do another sample!
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Old 07-21-2017, 04:31 AM   #7
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The heads of the characters are too large in a lot of shots. Hal Jordan's head in the first panel looks too big. I know it is closer to the camera than the rest of his body, but it still looks too big.

Jordan's head in the second panel of page 2 looks too big again.

His head in the third panel of page 3 looks too big again. Watch out for those head sizes. Fix your heads and your figures will look quite a bit better, though there are probably some other issues with them. I'd have to take a closer look. The heads are just what immediately popped out to me. Their heads look large and their bodies look squat, which isn't a very aesthetic look to my eyes. I would figure out exactly what mis-configurations are causing that effect and change them.
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Old 07-27-2017, 12:18 PM   #8
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That was a big load of nothing Charles Sorry.
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Charles: Edit. He doesn't need to know your hopes and fears, only what works and what doesn't.
He asked for our thoughts, so I gave him my thoughts. He asked twice, before anyone gave him any thoughts, so I tried to help him out. He is free to disregard my thoughts.
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Old 07-27-2017, 12:49 PM   #9
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He asked for our thoughts, so I gave him my thoughts. He asked twice, before anyone gave him any thoughts, so I tried to help him out. He is free to disregard my thoughts.
You wrote paragraph after paragraph and didn't say a whole lot. Nobody is telling you not to express yourself, simply that a critique isn't about you: it's about the person being critiqued. Not your chance to pontificate. Be concise, be direct.
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Old 07-29-2017, 08:31 PM   #10
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You wrote paragraph after paragraph and didn't say a whole lot. Nobody is telling you not to express yourself, simply that a critique isn't about you: it's about the person being critiqued. Not your chance to pontificate. Be concise, be direct.
You express your opinions your way, and I will express my opinions my way. Occasionally, others find value in some opinion that I post pertaining to art.
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Old 08-07-2017, 02:56 AM   #11
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Matt is giving the best advice here. Be yourself and learn that there are 100's of people that go through these forums so they can hear themselves speak.

As far as the work. Practice, practice, practice. Learn, learn, learn.
Decent foundation here just need to stay the course and dont forget to master the basics.

Good luck
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Old 08-08-2017, 02:15 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by DubbJJart View Post
Matt is giving the best advice here. Be yourself and learn that there are 100's of people that go through these forums so they can hear themselves speak.

As far as the work. Practice, practice, practice. Learn, learn, learn.
Decent foundation here just need to stay the course and dont forget to master the basics.

Good luck
That's true. A thing to keep in mind is that while there are a lot of helpful tips to be found, it's important to remember that just because someone says something, doesn't always mean there is actually something 'wrong' with that particular aspect of your work, or that it needs addressing. A perceived flaw is not necessarily always a flaw.

For example, if you want to draw a Green Lantern with a crow bar, have at it. You can make that interesting. Personally, I think if you make every single construct very elaborate, it may look like you're trying too hard or over doing it. A Lantern doesn't need to make a whose-it-what's-it or a giant mecha just to perform a simple task. And given the context of the situation in the art presented here, I feel some really elaborate thing would be out of place. Plus, mostly everyone knows a crow bar and what it's for. If you were to make a complicated mass driver to open a door instead, it would just... eat up attention that it probably shouldn't.

I've had it told to me that I "need" to listen to people when they say something, implying I need to follow through with some action. I'll listen to what I feel is useful, but sometimes it seems people say stuff just to say stuff, and if you get hung up on a bunch of tiny inconsequential things, like, for example, that you (OP) may have left the trim and bleed clear above one panel on page 3) or on EVERYONE's opinion, you will never get anything done. I can assure you that 99% of your readers won't really care about that, or even pay it any note whatsoever.
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