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Schwag_dog_01 · 09-22-2009, 06:04 PM

Hey guys just wanted some opinions on some of my sequentials

these are all of the sequentials i have they have no particular order and aside from the last three they are not connected I just would like any advice you guys can give I already got some great advice from Jim G and Cheeseburger but Ill take all the advice I can get. Ill keep posting stuff as soon as I get it scanned but till then this is all I got.

and I'm a newbie trying to make it in comics so don't leash the dogs let me have it I want it all good bad and what ever is in between. Im here because i love drawing and i love comics and I want to combine those loves into a career someday, and I can only do so with the help of those who have the insight experience and knowledge necessary to become a comic book artist.
thanks

-JMS

j giar · 09-22-2009, 06:56 PM

Jordan,

Since you posted here a couple times and no ones given you any crits, I'd like to. Purely because you obviously take your art seriously and your enthusiasm is not only admirable but refreshing...So
..lets start with your art in general...
Really the only thing I can tell you is to keep drawing. But to really make the impact I can't stress drawing from real life over comics enough. Comic or sequential art is about clarity and story. Story being the number one. Without clarity there is no story. That means you'll get to a point where you have to draw the body or head at odd angles to make your pages interesting. Or to draw items in a rooms or surroundings, cars buildings...etc. You get the idea. From what I can see on your site, you need to focus on anatomy, figure drawing, facials expressions, clothing drapery. Your figure work is good, but stiff and very static looking. It lacks life. I'd be interested to see your sketch work and how you're building your figures. That appears to be the crux of the problem, leaving no form or volume to the figures.This can only be accomplished by doing what you're already doing, which is to draw your ass off. And I mean draw everything you can think of. Think of anything you hate to draw and draw it...a lot. Over come it and move to the next. You have a few things going for you...Some talent, that can be improved so don't be to hard on yourself...but don't sit back and feel sorry for yourself either. And you have enthusiasm which goes a helluva long way as well.
Sequential work....A few things to think of. Story...There's story...and then very important..STORY. Your goal as the artist is to tell the story. Take the reader from panel to panel, don't let them get lost or bored and get them to the next page. Make them want to turn the page. Right now your work suffers from poor camera angles or POV's. Lack of Clarity (see the first part) and momentum. And all this will only come from two things. Doing and studying. Something each one of us on here has been through, is going through and will always go through.
So...Keep doing what you're doing, but do it more. To keep your focus keep track of your progress. Always look back at where you were and where you're at. It will motivate, it will give you confidence in your work and will give you the drive to improve. Hang around here and there a ton of people that will help you and give you crits.
Some books I can suggest...
Cary Nord pushed me into Andrew Loomis's books and they were and are invaluable. You can download them for free. (Google it and if you can't find it PM me and I'll see if I have the link.) As far as comic storytelling..Panel Discussions, Any of Scott McClouds books, any Will Eisners books. Most of these you can pick up used copies for cheap on Amazon or used book stores.
Hope this helped. Keep posting and keep working. J.

cheeseisgood1918 · 09-22-2009, 08:09 PM

Listen to giar, he speaks true. For the record, it's hard to get crits when your work is posted the way it is. It's difficult to call out specific problems that way. You obviously work hard on your art and your site, but the best advice I can give you is to open a photobucket or imageshack account and post your work there. When you upload it, the site will provide you with image links. Copy the link and open a new thread. Above the text box there is a little yellow and gray picture of mountains. Click it and paste your image link in the pop up box. That's it! Don't worry, I had trouble with it when I first joined.

As for you art, J is right on. One thing I will say about your sequentials is that you have some imaginative panels. And you obviously put a lot of work into drawing. A few things I would say is don't shy away from environments. Get used to drawing them now, even if you hate them. I always worked on figure drawing until just a year or two ago, and it was a process to unlearn all my bad habits, and learn the right way to do things. I still slip into my old ways sometimes if I don't pay close attention. So draw environment in EVERYTHING.... sequesntials, pinups everything. You have your characters interacting with objects within the environments which is good, but the objects and backgrounds are flat. Use some more detail and shading in them.

Also, experiment with line weight. Things in the foreground or things you are supposed to focus on in a panel should have heavier lines, and things in the background, thinner lines.

Read the books j giar recommended, and pay close attention to the composition chapters. There are a lot of rules to story telling that most people never think about(which is the way it should be if an artist is doing his/her job) that make a visual story great.

Other than that, just keep drawing, and keep posting here! I've learned more in the short amount of time I've been posting here than I ever learned in 20 years of drawing. This place is an invaluable tool as long as you can set your ego aside and take peoples advice as they mean it, which is to help you improve. Welcome to DW and good luck! Hope to see more of you in the future!

Schwag_dog_01 · 09-22-2009, 11:41 PM

Thanks guys it means a lot to actually here some feed back I'll make sure to follow your advice I cant tell you how much it really means to me to have it.
and Ill make sure to keep posting my work on DW hope you guys will keep helping out newbs like me.

-JMS

NaveenM · 09-23-2009, 12:11 PM

Focus on the basics. There are a ton of good books and other materials on this stuff. Get that stuff down cold, and then you can move on to letting your imagination run.

09-22-2009, 06:04 PM	#1
Schwag_dog_01 Hail to the King baby Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 65	New stuff Hey guys just wanted some opinions on some of my sequentials these are all of the sequentials i have they have no particular order and aside from the last three they are not connected I just would like any advice you guys can give I already got some great advice from Jim G and Cheeseburger but Ill take all the advice I can get. Ill keep posting stuff as soon as I get it scanned but till then this is all I got. and I'm a newbie trying to make it in comics so don't leash the dogs let me have it I want it all good bad and what ever is in between. Im here because i love drawing and i love comics and I want to combine those loves into a career someday, and I can only do so with the help of those who have the insight experience and knowledge necessary to become a comic book artist. thanks -JMS Last edited by Schwag_dog_01; 09-23-2009 at 03:47 PM. Reason: now with images on site

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09-22-2009, 06:56 PM	#2
j giar Has nothing to add. Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Elyria, Ohio Posts: 5,968	Jordan, Since you posted here a couple times and no ones given you any crits, I'd like to. Purely because you obviously take your art seriously and your enthusiasm is not only admirable but refreshing...So ..lets start with your art in general... Really the only thing I can tell you is to keep drawing. But to really make the impact I can't stress drawing from real life over comics enough. Comic or sequential art is about clarity and story. Story being the number one. Without clarity there is no story. That means you'll get to a point where you have to draw the body or head at odd angles to make your pages interesting. Or to draw items in a rooms or surroundings, cars buildings...etc. You get the idea. From what I can see on your site, you need to focus on anatomy, figure drawing, facials expressions, clothing drapery. Your figure work is good, but stiff and very static looking. It lacks life. I'd be interested to see your sketch work and how you're building your figures. That appears to be the crux of the problem, leaving no form or volume to the figures.This can only be accomplished by doing what you're already doing, which is to draw your ass off. And I mean draw everything you can think of. Think of anything you hate to draw and draw it...a lot. Over come it and move to the next. You have a few things going for you...Some talent, that can be improved so don't be to hard on yourself...but don't sit back and feel sorry for yourself either. And you have enthusiasm which goes a helluva long way as well. Sequential work....A few things to think of. Story...There's story...and then very important..STORY. Your goal as the artist is to tell the story. Take the reader from panel to panel, don't let them get lost or bored and get them to the next page. Make them want to turn the page. Right now your work suffers from poor camera angles or POV's. Lack of Clarity (see the first part) and momentum. And all this will only come from two things. Doing and studying. Something each one of us on here has been through, is going through and will always go through. So...Keep doing what you're doing, but do it more. To keep your focus keep track of your progress. Always look back at where you were and where you're at. It will motivate, it will give you confidence in your work and will give you the drive to improve. Hang around here and there a ton of people that will help you and give you crits. Some books I can suggest... Cary Nord pushed me into Andrew Loomis's books and they were and are invaluable. You can download them for free. (Google it and if you can't find it PM me and I'll see if I have the link.) As far as comic storytelling..Panel Discussions, Any of Scott McClouds books, any Will Eisners books. Most of these you can pick up used copies for cheap on Amazon or used book stores. Hope this helped. Keep posting and keep working. J.

09-22-2009, 08:09 PM	#3
cheeseisgood1918 cheeseisgood1981 Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Up in ya Posts: 1,618	Listen to giar, he speaks true. For the record, it's hard to get crits when your work is posted the way it is. It's difficult to call out specific problems that way. You obviously work hard on your art and your site, but the best advice I can give you is to open a photobucket or imageshack account and post your work there. When you upload it, the site will provide you with image links. Copy the link and open a new thread. Above the text box there is a little yellow and gray picture of mountains. Click it and paste your image link in the pop up box. That's it! Don't worry, I had trouble with it when I first joined. As for you art, J is right on. One thing I will say about your sequentials is that you have some imaginative panels. And you obviously put a lot of work into drawing. A few things I would say is don't shy away from environments. Get used to drawing them now, even if you hate them. I always worked on figure drawing until just a year or two ago, and it was a process to unlearn all my bad habits, and learn the right way to do things. I still slip into my old ways sometimes if I don't pay close attention. So draw environment in EVERYTHING.... sequesntials, pinups everything. You have your characters interacting with objects within the environments which is good, but the objects and backgrounds are flat. Use some more detail and shading in them. Also, experiment with line weight. Things in the foreground or things you are supposed to focus on in a panel should have heavier lines, and things in the background, thinner lines. Read the books j giar recommended, and pay close attention to the composition chapters. There are a lot of rules to story telling that most people never think about(which is the way it should be if an artist is doing his/her job) that make a visual story great. Other than that, just keep drawing, and keep posting here! I've learned more in the short amount of time I've been posting here than I ever learned in 20 years of drawing. This place is an invaluable tool as long as you can set your ego aside and take peoples advice as they mean it, which is to help you improve. Welcome to DW and good luck! Hope to see more of you in the future!

09-22-2009, 11:41 PM	#4
Schwag_dog_01 Hail to the King baby Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 65	Thanks guys it means a lot to actually here some feed back I'll make sure to follow your advice I cant tell you how much it really means to me to have it. and Ill make sure to keep posting my work on DW hope you guys will keep helping out newbs like me. -JMS

09-23-2009, 12:11 PM	#5
NaveenM I should be writing. Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Philly Posts: 906	Focus on the basics. There are a ton of good books and other materials on this stuff. Get that stuff down cold, and then you can move on to letting your imagination run.