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Marqphillipsp3
10-07-2016, 04:19 PM
Hello again,
Next round of portfolio pages, I used rain, a ton of water physics, and tighter perspective on these, as well as some fancy paneling (even a 100% seamless double page splash)! I'm training up on all of this so my case can be made to various editors! I wanted to, as with my Green Lantern pages, drawn a character I hadn't previously drawn. So I picked Aquaman this time around, I even gave him a old Navy Sailor redesign! My favorite is page 4; the paneling forms Aquaman's trident! I Hope you all like it, Please tell me your thoughts, I check this everyday!

http://other00.deviantart.net/995e/o/2016/281/d/2/d2fa4458be6b1678ee82847b1c29aced.jpg
http://other00.deviantart.net/fec7/o/2016/281/4/c/4cfe618fa4d67525f8b76307e0b7f1a1.jpg
http://other00.deviantart.net/9305/o/2016/281/e/a/ea9697d56624534736e3c15e213ddd92.jpg
http://other00.deviantart.net/86b4/o/2016/281/0/d/0d788236b810cf4eb3a2d5cc52b1c0f8.jpg
http://other00.deviantart.net/b5e2/o/2016/281/a/1/a1b671400522566425c202ba65656d9e.jpg

I'm looking for work right now! I'm knocking out a page and a half a day, I'm raring to go! Let me know if you've got a story to tell! Here's my e-Portfolio for more work as well as my contact information. http://marqphillips.daportfolio.com/

P.S, I've partnered up with the ever talented JL Straw with TheInkPages, see her work here! http://theinkpages.deviantart.com/

Thanks again all,
Marq Phillips

jorgezeraba
10-10-2016, 02:04 AM
I appreciate the amount of work that you put into these pages. Very much so, but it distracts tremendously from the clarity of the storytelling of the pages.

I can't tell what is going on to be honest. I think perhaps, some simplifying needs to be considered in the future.

Yes, I understand the mindset that goes into pages, especially to get a gig, as much detail put into to "impress." But I feel storytelling is number one in comics, that is what makes comics really work. Details, if necessary, come later.

Marqphillipsp3
10-10-2016, 10:58 AM
Thanks, there was a lot experiment in these pages for me. Now I know they didn't all work out as I'd have liked. and now going forward I can adjust! I appreciate the honesty.

ArminOzdic
10-10-2016, 08:30 PM
I completely agree with jorgezeraba.
And that hand sticking out that much in first panel of the first page ruins otherwise really good page, IMHO.
These are good, keep up the hard work!

theroguetennant
10-13-2016, 12:12 AM
As always, your work is absolutely stunning. It's not perfect, nothing ever is, but it's damn near it. I'd love to read any comic drawn by you, man. Keep up the good work!

PS: Nice touch with the mustache, lol. Makes Arthur look like a proper gent.

MBirkhofer
10-13-2016, 09:24 AM
Solid pages.
I wouldn't go as far as the others with "hard to read". But the thought did cross my mind as well.
Largely I find the reason for that is overshading/hatching. and some confusing panel borders/intersections. Rain on top of wave hatching. I pity the inker.

Page 1.
The water forming the panel borders for panels 3-5 is fantastic..
however. why in the world did you draw the lightning bolt? that is NOT forming a panel border, yet is intersecting panel 2 as if it was. Worse, its cutting into panel 1 guys hand, in a poor tangent.
panel 1 guys hand breaking the border serves no real point. and, again worse, is covering up the boat for no reason, and intersecting that lightning.
Panel 1 bg, and panel 2 bg are at two different angles, yet the rain is matching.
Panel 3-5 do it right, with rain being opposite.

page 2-3.
very solid.
Panels 3-4.
The boat edge bisects those panels. can be fixed in colors obviously, but right now, it almost seems like there are 7 panels on the page. the heavy shadowing on the boat interior there is probably the issue.
his foot escaping panel 5 intentional? that is really not how breaking panel borders works...
Do it for depth or motion.

page 4.
yep. best page.
Extreme closeups on water droplets is fantastic. This is exactly how you use panel breaks with it, and the kraken.

page 5.
solid.

page 6.
solid.

Marqphillipsp3
10-13-2016, 06:15 PM
Thanks again! I'm working on new pages now to address some of the issues brought up, and my portfolio site is live again! I'm glad to have such comprehensive feedback on here! it really is helping me get better!

Afro
10-18-2016, 01:00 PM
I don't think there's much to add that hasn't been said. But I know how it feels to post on here and look for feedback, and you respond so that's good.

I think the main thing you have going for you is your attention to detail, like I can tell you are having fun for sure. The sea monster looks amazing, you have set up the environment of there being a violent storm and I think that's pretty tough to pull off.

Your lighting is very good as well, I like the captain looking up and you can only see his eyes and teeth.

Now, the only things that really get me and this may be from the script so I don't know...

The big double page splash it reads as if Aquaman is telling the sea monster to attack the boat. Mainly because He's the first image on the left and he's doing the telepathy thing. Also, where is he in this shot? He's not on the boat yet, so if he's underwater, I'm not sure. Otherwise I could assume he's standing on the sea monster telling it to eat the boat.

I do like the new look on aquaman, but if you are going to show this to big editors,(especially dc) you should show them the version of aquaman that they have. It gives them confidence you can play in their sandbox.

I do like your panel layouts but you do need to be careful of going over the top too much in one page. It's a lot to absorb in addition to your attention to detail.

The last thing that I would have liked to see was more scenes with aquaman and the sea monster, but that's maybe more script than your interpretation of it. But I really do enjoy your style and it's cool to look at. I'm sure you and your inker make a good combination.

MattTriano
10-27-2016, 01:58 AM
These are nice overall. Good drawing, nice expressions. Slow down to a page of pencils per day. You don't need to work on speed. You need to spend more time refining compositions, utilizing reference, drawing 'through' your subjects. Try not to break so many panel borders; design the page to fit all the information. That may mean reorganizing your information and doing multiple roughs, trying different solutions to the same problem.

I like the thinking on Arthur's hairstyle but I wasn't quite sure it was him; looks like 19th Century Aquaman. Cool but they do want to see that you care about their versions of their characters. Silly but makes an editor's job evaluating your samples easier.

Do a new set every week, new circumstances, change clothes and locations. Add fire, electricity, hand-to-hand combat, acts of kindness, injury etc. No double page spreads. Don't repeat shots. Samples should move fast.

Example: Arthur Curry on the surface in street clothes, he senses the danger offshore, changes into his Atlantean armor and dives in. Fisherman on a boat miles offshore are relaxing, drinking, the boat hits something and beaches mid-ocean, the guys come out to see a monster attacking! Maybe a monster that Arthur won't be able to reach with his mind. Aquaman shows up, asks his own giant sea monster to help. Aquaman and a giant squid or fleet of Great Whites or something of your own invention fight a giant Ice Age seahawk or a dinosaur or something fun. The battle rages, we focus on a fisherman hit by falling boat debris, trapped. He closes his eyes tightly, when he opens them (I like your ending here) they've run aground on a desert island. 5-7 pages.

Thanks for sharing. Show more when you can!

Keep going.

Best,
M

Marqphillipsp3
10-27-2016, 08:13 AM
Thanks again Afro and Matt for your thoughtful insight. I tried a lot of new stuff with the samples. Some stuff worked some stuff didn't. I have already posted some new samples addressing these issues here: http://www.digitalwebbing.com/forums/showthread.php?t=177882
You're absolutely right, drawing so fast was detrimental to my page quality. Taking the time to really make pages work and slowing down to a page a day has already helped my pages get quantifiably better. Please check them out I love to hear your thoughts. Also I am working on new samples to put up in the coming week.