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DavidNH
06-03-2016, 04:18 PM
I have a project with my close friend and decided to make a comic based on poetry. But since the poetry is in our native language I wont post them here. XD

I made all the art here from pencils to painting. I really appreciate your critiques guys. Thanks

http://orig15.deviantart.net/d417/f/2016/154/5/e/2_asep_kecil_by_huftness-da4v4et.jpg


http://orig02.deviantart.net/2961/f/2016/155/b/8/3_asep_kecil_by_huftness-da4yyq1.jpg

SamRoads
06-03-2016, 06:07 PM
The artwork is beautiful. As sequential art (ie comic art) I think it doesn't deliver.

I don't know what the story is, based on the art. And sequential art should (probably) be able to tell the story without dialogue.

Why does your poetry want sequential art to accompany it? Why are not these lovely pictures acceptable as accompanying illustrations?

DavidNH
06-04-2016, 08:57 AM
Thank you very much Sam. Yeah mate, 1 page is for 1 poetry. So there is no connection between the first page and the second.

Hmm maybe the first one is too complicated? Do you think I put too many elements there?

For the second I believe the art is quite straight to the topic (love between couple).

DavidNH
06-07-2016, 06:34 PM
Here is another page.

http://orig09.deviantart.net/97b1/f/2016/158/c/d/asep_5_kecil_by_huftness-da5df2c.jpg