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View Full Version : Old 2012 Rejected Submission part 2


whdvorak
08-03-2013, 10:12 AM
Here is the 2nd half.

Page 12 (5 panels)

Panel 1
Glorianna, Dr. Hail and her henchmen stand before the Capstone. The Capstone radiates a pulsating red energy. Dr. Hail and the henchmen shield their eyes with their hands and back away from the Capstone.

CAP
I'm destined to control the 13 artifacts and the world. I've been training for that my whole life.

Glorianna:
Dr. Hail. What should we do next? Can you access this gateway?

Dr. Hail:
Accesses it? You must be joking? Even if you believe in that sort of thing, It's a gateway to the primal plane of fire. I assume it would be like opening a doorway to Hell.

Panel 2
Glorianna, changes into her horned and fiery goddess look. Dr. Hail is mystified by the transformation.

Glorianna:
I'm quite aware of where this gateway leads, Dr. Hail, your work on the existence of the primal dimensions is the reason I hired you and funded your research.

Panel 3
Glorianna, stands next to, Dr. Hail, and stares down at him. In the background we can see the
Capstone glowing with red energy.

Glorianna:
If what you write is true, then this would be a permanent portal to this plane and it's inhabitants.

Dr. Hail:
Why would you want to do such a thing? What are you a demon?

Panel 4
Glorianna, bursts into laughter. Dr. Hail cowers in the red glow of both the Capstone and, Glorianna.

Glorianna:
Ha-Ha! A demon! No little man, I'm not one of those blundering abominations. I'm, Glorianna Silver. I am the bearer of the Ember Stone. I am Fire and flame. I am a primal force of nature. Beyond that gateway is an army of flames, for me to command.

Panel 5
Glorianna, turns to the capstone and begins caressing the stone lovingly.

Glorianna:
Those who oppose me have legions at their command. Legions that hinder my destiny of collecting the thirteen artifacts. With the aid of the forces beyond this gateway, I shall be victorious.
Page 13 (5 panels)

Panel 1
Glorianna, transforms into her dragon form. Dr. Hail cowers on the floor, paralyzed with fear.

Dr. Hail: (Burst)
You can change into a Dragon!

Glorianna:
Dr. Hail, your life depends on opening this gateway?

Dr. Hail:
I have no idea how to open it, Ms. Silver, But I would summarize that the Capstone is just that, a cap that needs to be removed.

Panel 2
With a swipe of the Dragon's tail, the Capstone is sent hurtling into a far corner of the cavern. A beam of red light and fire shoots from the hole now revealed beneath the capstone.

Panel 3
Dr. Hail runs from the red light and Glorianna. The two henchmen back away with arms raised to shield themselves. Their clothes begin to smolder from the heat. Glorianna, the dragon, stares excitedly into the flames.

Glorianna: (Burst)
I can feel it's glorious power! And I can sense the presences of those I seek within!

Panel 4
Dr. Hail hides behind a clump of boulders and retrieves a digital recorder from his bag to record the events.

Dr. Hail:
Laughed at my theory of the primal gates they did, but who's watching some flame goddess open one of those portals; me thatís who.

Panel 5
Extreme close up of the dragon's smiling face.

Glorianna:
They are coming. They are coming to meet their Queen.


Page 14 (5 panels)

Panel 1
An explosion of heat and flames erupt from the gateway filling the cave.

Panel 2
Both of, Glorianna's, henchmen are incinerated by the explosion.

Panel 3
Dr. Hail crouches behind the boulders as flames pass over his head.

Dr. Hail:
Oh my God!

Panel 4
After the burst of flame subsides, Dr. Hail rises up from behind the boulder, slapping his clothes that smolder in several places.

Dr. Hail:
Ow! Ow! Ow!

Panel 5
A smoldering and smoking, Dr. Hail, watches, as a swirling vortex of fire from the gateway begins taking on a humanoid form.


Page 16 (Splash Page)

Panel 1
Flames roll off the rippling muscles of a fiery Jinn. Plumes of smoke rise from his horns and the air around him shimmers with heat. The Jinn looks very intimidating and is as large as, Glorianna's, dragon form. In the background the peeping head of Dr. Hail can bee seen above the pile of boulders he is hiding behind.

Jinn:
I sense the Ember Stone.

Glorianna:
It's here and I am its bearer. I am, Glorianna Silver, your new master.


Page 17 (5panels)

Panel 1
The Jinn grins maliciously at Glorianna.

Jinn:
Ha! Ha! Ha! You presume much mortal. I have no master. I am A Jinn lord and answer to no one.

Panel 2
An angry, Glorianna, flares with anger and spreads her dragon wings.

Glorianna: (burst)
I am the bearer of the Ember Stone! I command the element of fire! It bends to my will as will you!

Panel 3
The Jinn is still amused as he speaks.

Jinn:
You might bear the Ember Stone, but many fools have possessed it over the years. And many fools have thought to test the elders of the plane of flame and died.

Panel 4
An enraged, Glorianna, breathes dragon fire all over the Jinn, obscuring it from view.

Panel 5
The flames subsided and an unharmed and smiling Jinn remains, now holding a massive scimitar.

Jinn:
You would attack a son of flame with fire? You prove you're unworthy to command even the simplest of beings from my realm.


Page 18-19 (Double spread with panels 2,3,4 and 5 running along the bottom of both pages)

Panel 1 (Double spread)
A furious, Glorianna, in Dragon form grapples with the Jinn, The Jinn is pushed backwards from the assault.

Glorianna: (BURST)
ROAR!!!

Panel 2
Close up of the two grappling with each other. Glorianna's, claws rake the Jinn's chest, releasing fiery blood.

Jinn:
You have mastered the dragon form! Good! Very Good!

Panel 3
Glorianna, bats away the Jinn's sword, as the Jinn swings it at her.

Panel 4 (Slightly Tilted)
The sword flies from the Jinn's hand and embeds itself into the cave wall. The panel should show action lines of the impact.

SFX:
THOOM!

Panel 5
Dr. Hail looks up at the ropes still hanging down from the hole above, as rocks fall from the ceiling.



Page 20 (5 panels)

Panel 1
The Jinn now pinned beneath the dragon summons a gale of wind so fierce, it hurls, Glorianna, off of him.

Jinn:
Show me mortal. Show me your power.

Panel 2
Glorianna, lands with a massive thud on her dragon back. Again the panel should appear to vibrate.

SFX:
BOOM!

Panel 3
Glorianna, leaps and grapples again with the Jinn, Glorianna, bites the Jinn on his shoulder.

Panel 4
Dr. Hail scrambles over the lip of the entrance to the cave tops side. The Omani tribes men are little dots on the horizon, as they run away.

Dr. Hail:
Thanks for the help. Jerks.

Panel 5
Close up view of Dr. Hail's feet as the ground shakes.


Page 21 (5 panels)

Panel 1
A section of the ground falls away next to, Dr. Hail, plummeting into the cavern below.

Panel 2
Dr. Hail begins running, his arms pumping furiously.

Panel 3
A close up of Dr. Hails Feet as more portions of the cavern roof collapse into the cave bellow.

Panel 4
Dr. Hail is running with wild panic as the stone beneath him collapses and he falls with the crumbling rocks into the cavern.

Panel 5
Extreme close up of dragon claws grabbing the clothes on Dr. Hail's back.


Page 22 (Splash Page)

Panel 1
Birds eye view of the dragon form, Glorianna, flying above what had once been the massive cave of
Majlis al Jinn. The cave is now a huge smoking crater.

Dr. Hail:
Did you win Ms. Silver?

Glorianna:
Unfortunately we were interrupted by the falling stones. It will be a small matter to clear away the debris and start again.

Dr. Hail:
I'm not sure what you're looking at Ms. Silver, but that looks like more than a small matter.

Glorianna:
The gateway is completely covered and will need to be cleared. I'm putting you in charge of the task Dr. Hail.

Dr. Hail:
Oh? OK.