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View Full Version : Power Pals #1 - first 7 pages (rewrite)


darkwriter
07-24-2013, 11:11 PM
POWER PALS

by

Darren Higham


RATBOY Image for Reference (http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/117/c/7/ratboy___yj_style___redesign__by_shubcthulhu-d638e0p.jpg)




PAGE ONE (Five Panels)


PANEL ONE: Low angle of a street in GATE CITY at night. Numerous stores run the length of the street on either side, their signs damaged and / or covered in graffiti. The buildings themselves are the large Gothic type with elegant carvings and gargoyles carved into them, several of them have fire escapes just above their windows. This is not the kind of place you wish to stay too long in.


The windows are dark and unlit, except for one which is on the bottom left of the panel. It should be just about off the panel..


A small handful of people can be seen walking hurriedly, their heads kept low and their arms either seemingly crossed in front of them or else kept firmly in their pockets. Exact amount of people and direction they are heading is not overly important, but it shouldn't be more than half a dozen

CAPTION
Gate City


CAPTION
“The City of the Future”


CAPTION
“The City of Dreams”

PANEL TWO: Front view of the lit window, The window has been broken, the hole large enough to allow a full grown man to climb through with relative ease. A sign above the window reads “SWAN JEWELLERY”


Framed in the window itself we can see the silhouettes of two men.

CAPTION
“The City of OPPORTUNITIES”

THIEF ONE
(left silhouette)
Just grab whatever you can. We need to be out of here in two.


PANEL THREE: Inside the store, we can now clearly see the two men. They look like your typical comic book thieves. The are dressed all in black and wearing balaclavas over their faces. THIEF ONE, the smaller and thinner of the two, is stood next to the window looking out at the street. THIEF TWO, a large and well built man, is shining a flash-light over a row of display cabinets


THIEF TWO
I thought you took care of the alarm, so what's the rush?


THIEF ONE
I did, but the cops are not the only thing to worry about these days.


THIEF ONE
One minute thirty


THIEF TWO
You mean that Rat kid? Oh, and your counting isn't helping.



PANEL FOUR: Same shot as last panel, except now THIEF ONE has now turned his attention to THIEF TWO, who, is smashing open the glass tops of a display cabinet with the bottom of his flash-light.

SFX
(CABINET)
CRASH

PANEL FIVE: Close on THIEF TWO as he pushes a handful of jewels into a bag

THIEF TWO
Ok... and... done.


THIEF TWO:
You worry too much. Anyone ever tell you that?


PAGE TWO (Four Panels)


PANEL ONE: Same angle and view as Page One, Panel One. But now most of the panel is being took up by the “Rat Plane”. It is a sleek black vehicle which hovering a few feet above the ground. From the angle we are looking we can clearly see that it's overall shape somewhat resembles a rat with the four “landing feet” being designed to resemble the small front legs and large back legs of a rat.

NO COPY


PANEL TWO: Close on THIEF ONE as he climbs out of the window towards us. His face is obscured by a large bag.

THIEF ONE
Man this thing is heavy. You pack the safe in here as well?

RATBOY
(off panel)
You need a hand with that?

THIEF ONE
Huh?



PANEL THREE: Back inside the store, THIEF TWO has had to dive to the side to avoid being hit by THIEF ONE who is hurtling backwards into the store.

SFX
WOOOSH


PANEL FOUR: RATBOY is stood in the window, framed by the shards of broken glass, cracking his knuckles menacingly.

RATBOY
Now, I seriously doubt that either of you have ANYTHING in your wardrobes that goes with those.


RATBOY
(thinking)
Gotta love those silent alarms.


PAGE THREE (Five Panels)


PANEL ONE: In the store, surrounded by broken glass and pieces of jewellery, RATBOY has blocked a punch by THIEF TWO which had been aimed at the right side of his head.

CAPTION
(RATBOY)
The name's Luke, Luke Payne.


CAPTION
(RATBOY)
The only son of billionaire inventor and entrepreneur, Xander Payne.


CAPTION
(RATBOY)
And a multi-millionaire inventor in my own right.


PANEL TWO: Low angle on THIEF ONE who is now on his knees. Behind him THIEF TWO has thrown another, more successful, punch at RATBOY hitting him hard in the ribs on the left side of his body.

CAPTION
(RATBOY)
Not that these two, 'would-be' jewel thieves, are aware of that.


CAPTION
(RATBOY)
People like this only know me by one name...


PANEL THREE: THIEF TWO has arms wrapped tightly around RATBOY's waist as he pushes the young hero towards a wall. THIEF ONE can be seen jumping out of the broken window, desperate to get away before more trouble arrives.

CAPTION
(RATBOY)
...RATBOY

THIEF ONE
Sorry man. You're on your own.


PANEL FOUR: THIEF TWO has RATBOY pinned against the wall, his forearm pressed firmly against the young heroes neck

THIEF TWO
Not so tough now, eh kid?

PANEL FIVE: Low angle shot, close on RATBOY's mechanical tail as it wraps itself around THIEF TWO's left leg

NO COPY


PAGE FOUR (Four Panels)


PANEL ONE: RATBOY's tail has suddenly lifted THIEF TWO's leg high into the air, causing the man to topple backwards.

THIEF TWO
HO—LY!


PANEL TWO: Looking down at THIEF TWO lying on his back, the wind knocked out of him. RATBOY is looming menacingly over him.

NO COPY


PANEL THREE: Close on RATBOY's right foot. It is hitting THIEF TWO hard in the face.

SFX
WAKK


PANEL FOUR: Low angle shot of the now unconscious THIEF TWO. Behind him RATBOY is stepping through the window.

RATBOY
ARNIE*, the man who just left. Send the Rats. Surveillance mode.


RATBOY:
Oh and send one to tie up the man inside.


THIEF TWO
(SMALL)
Urrrrrk


CAPTION
* “Arnie” RATBOY's pet name for the R.N.I. (Rat Network Interface)


PAGE FIVE (Five Panels)


PANEL ONE: RATBOY is climbing up one of the fire escapes.

NO COPY


PANEL TWO: THIEF ONE is running down a dark, trash filled, alley. He hasn't noticed the dozen or so glowing red eyes watching him from the shadows.


(note to letterer: Arnie is a computer so his font should reflect that)

CAPTION
(ARNIE)
Sir, the RATS* have him, he is heading down an alley towards Third Street.


CAPTION
*RATS – Reconnaissance And Tracking Systems


PANEL THREE: Low angle wide shot. THIEF ONE is emerging from the alley on to THIRD STREET. Like the last street it is a row of Gothic buildings all of which are in a state of disrepair. A young woman moves by in front of THIEF ONE, her head looking down towards the ground. Whatever is going on it is none of her business. Above THIEF ONE, looking down from the roof of one of the buildings, is RATBOY

RATBOY
Thanks Arnie, I've got him.


PANEL FOUR: Close on THIEF ONE as he pushes past the young woman, knocking her to the ground.

THIEF ONE
Out of my way woman.


WOMAN
Hey! Watch it.


PANEL FIVE: From behind THIEF ONE, A shadowy figure has landed in front of him, stopping him dead in his tracks. Motion lines should be used to show that the figure has fallen from above him. While it shouldn't be visibly clear to the reader, the shadowy figure is of course, RATBOY.

NO COPY


PAGE SIX (Four Panels)

PANEL ONE: RATBOY does a sweeping kick, knocking THIEF ONE's legs out from beneath him.

CAPTION
(ARNIE)
Sir, the GCPD have arrived at Swan Jewellers and apprehended the thief.


CAPTION
(ARNIE)
I moved the Rat Plane and engaged cloaking mode.


PANEL TWO: RATBOY is crouched next to THIEF ONE, his left knee holding down the man's arm while his right foot is planted firmly on the THIEF ONE's chest.

RATBOY
You going to give up quietly?


THIEF ONE
Get off me.


PANEL THREE: Very close on RATBOY's face. His eyes are narrowed and there is an evil looking grin spread across his face. He is absolutely loving this.

RATBOY
Shall I take that as a NO?


RATBOY
Glad to hear it.


PANEL FOUR: Low angle side shot. RATBOY punches THIEF ONE hard in the face.

SFX
THUMP


PAGE SEVEN (Three Panels)

PANEL ONE: RATBOY is stood over THIEF ONE looking down at the unconscious man.

CAPTION
(RATBOY)
He really should have said yes.


CAPTION
(RATBOY)
At least he would still have all his teeth.


PANEL TWO: Low angle, closer on RATBOY. Behind him, hovering a few feet in the air, is the Rat Plane.

ARNIE
(from the plane)
Sir, officers are en route, ETA, one minute.


ARNIE
(joined)
Also, sir, it is almost two and you have school in the morning.


PANEL THREE: Big panel, taking up at least half of the page. High angle, bird's eye view. The Rat Plane is hovering high above the buildings while below it a small crowd has begun to gather around the unconscious THIEF ONE. A police car can be seen entering the panel from the top.

NO COPY