Introducing Mr. WOW

[Nic]

Here he is Mr. WOW
let know what you think

http://sneaxs.com/Mr.WOW%20cover1.jpg
http://sneaxs.com/PageWOW.jpg
http://sneaxs.com/Page-2%20Mr.WOW.jpg

[xaltair]

Wow...

[GRAPHITE REVOLVER]

Anatomy... :sure:

[mattchee]

and here i was expecting a picture of michael keaton....

[Nic]

thanks guys

GRAPHITE REVOLVER I m sorry to hear that you arent happy with your anatomy =(

[OZ!]

The coloring is great but it doesn't look like you have ever seen a human body. I'd study up on your anat really hard so that your art can catch up to your coloring skills. Do that and you will pack one hell of a combo. Good luck.

[Kep!]

Funny, after the lettering...which I choked on...not pretty, sorry...the coloring was the first thing I didn't like. The odd anatomy seemed to fit the weirdness of the scene so I assumed it was intentional, but the fuziness of the colors does zilch for me.

[Nic]

OZ! thanks
I am aware of the fact that my anatomy is not exactly perfect yet I dont think its that terrible either atleast not throughtout the pages
Plus if you concider the crazyness I chosse to exagerate the poses as much as possible not everything spiderman usually does is a very comfortable or realistic pose either yet its ok for him to do it.
I appreciate your comment however since like I said I do know that I still have flaws in my antaomy but if you think that my stuiff is that teribble and looks like I have never seen a human body before is a little hard worded dont you think so cus if that was the case you might aswell do it to pretty much evey second post on this forum.

Waht I m not ok with is the way GRAPHITE REVOLVER did it
there is no point in doing this
I will not learn a thing by his comment
Its not helping and it ignors all the work I put into this

And Kep I hope you choked on your lap =D
not really but rather than saying you had to choke after seeing the lettering you could give me some tips on how to improve it????
Cus you might be able to tell that I m not a letterer but wanted to have words in it nontheless.

Its the same about the colors other than saying that the futiness zlichs you you could try to be a little more specifc and tell me what you dont like, what you think needs improvement and what you like if anything at all.

If you dont do these things its just better to do what your mother might have thought you when you were little
"Kep! if you dont have anything nice or in this case constructive to say better say nothing"
What do you think???

Anyways
I dont want people that come into this thread and read what I have said to think that I have an ATITUDE and act DEFFENSIVE and am NOT OPEN FOR CRITS

cus I AM open for crits and I do know that I can improve otherwhise I wouldnt come here and post but I do not appreciate stupid comments that have no point other than letting me know that my work sucks..
As they say you cant argue over taste because its RELATIVE ever thaought about that?

Thanks

[Mowgli]

I think a thicker skin might be in order here.

Simply posting the word "anatomy" was a crit of sorts. No an articulated critique, but you got the idea. Had the poster wanted to be very helpful, he would have said more, but he simply pointed out that the anatomy needed work.

This is common on web forums or online critiques. Some people here give detailed and insightful critiques, while others don't. You should be used to it by now. There's no point in getting angry about a web forum acting like a web forum.

As far as the picture goes, I don't like the choice of all the pink skin with the background colors. The anatomy could be exaggeration but some of it (the lack of profile depth, no wrist obn the larger guy and the fingers bent too far back) bothers me and simply looks wrong. That's my opinion.

I did like the line about "thinking of chicken" when preparing for battle.

[Nic]

Mowgli
thanks see you were atleast a little precisly about the things you think look wrong and why they do I can work much better with that

and yes you are right and I know thats this is how forums are
or can be but do I always need to take it and let them do it all the time not only with me but with others too?

Or can I tell them that I do not see a point in it and that I dont appreciate it?

What do your prefer?

Anyways thanks for the crits and your opinoin I will try to work on my weekneses in the future

[bakatron]

hi nic - some crits. one thing im not seeing in the colouring itself is ambient reflection. for example shades of the pants need to be built into the skin and vice versa. normally ambient colour is very deterministic towards the overall colour pallette. are you drawing this traditionally and then colouring it on the pc or directly on the pc from scratch?

[JasonM]

The bad: get thicker skin like others said, because (also like others said) forums are like this. Sometimes people don't have time to get indepth, sometimes they're just a little rude about it. In the end though, you post, you take the feedback that makes sense and ignore what doesn't. Though helpful criticisms are always preferred to the easier tear down crits.

Anyway, the good...

As far as I'm concerned, I loved it the second I saw it. The anatomy is whacked in areas but I thought it was supposed to be given it fits the weird ass story. I loved the coloring and texturing, I thought it played up a cool street fighter feel blending cell work with comics. As for lettering, yeah, it sucks but so does my lettering which is why I can't critique it. Though I believe Kep was running some kind of workshop in the lettering area if I'm not mistaken, it's worth checking out (or paying someone to letter lol).

[Kep!]

Sure Nic, I'm happy to help...don't get offended, you posted for critique and you're getting it from some of the best in business. If you want artisic blow jobs, find another forum...here we do the real work. That said...

1. go to the lettering forum right here on DW and post these pages...we'll give you a full crit and tips. The main this you need to do are: 1. improve your font choices, they suck. You've got no eye for typography and what you've done doesn't compliment your art. It can be learned, but it's clear you haven't bothered yet. 2. Learn how to make balloons and tails...these looks terrible. 3. learn how to place...what you've done on that last page is ridiculous...does his ear actually speak? Is the title really coming out of his crotch? 4. Match your palette with the coloring so you don't pop of the page garishly. One of the other letterers around here calls it "clown puke".

Now, I'm thrilled to help anyone interested in learning...but you'll forgive me, I'm sure, if I have trouble putting many years of experience into a post here. Come to the lettering forum and we'll pollute your mind, give you full tips and tutorials and probably help you learn how to letter 1000 times faster than you would on your own.

Coloring: First, it all looks fuzzy to me. It's style, probably, but it doesn't match the line work. The blue hues also don't come off as right for the scene. Now, that's purely a style thing...I have a a few artists I work with who do this all the time and they do just fine in this business...personally, I don't like it. However, your light sources are all over the place. Which is in shocking contrast to some pretty good blends and cuts...usually the skills are learned in reverse...so you've got the hard part down (at least, I found it to be the hard part).

If you dont do these things its just better to do what your mother might have thought you when you were little
"Kep! if you dont have anything nice or in this case constructive to say better say nothing"
What do you think???

What do I think? I think being a dick to a guy who you want free advice from is a bad idea. Grow a pair and you'll do fine in this business once you get the basics down...I see raw talent here, but attitude you can leave in your pants. What do you think???

[Nic]

What do I think? I think being a dick to a guy who you want free advice from is a bad idea. Grow a pair and you'll do fine in this business once you get the basics down...I see raw talent here, but attitude you can leave in your pants. What do you think???


I would agree with you that being a dick to someone who I ask for advice is not a good thing but did you concider when I started to be a dick?
Right after you said you had to choke after you saw the lettering.
Now is that not kind of rude too?

I really appreciate all the other things you said now after I was a dick to you.

You are right I m trying to get crits from people who dont have to do it and I do appreciate help full crits A LOT trus me but if they are not helpful I dont care much.

Plus I do know that this is not a place to get artistic blowjobs to use your words but I dont want to be jerked on either =) isnt that a nice way to say it?

Anyways
I will post these and if I do more of them in the lettering area too but I just posted them here because I did everything on the pages and thought hey if someone has to say something about the drawing this is fine but its also a sequential and colored and lettered see where I m going?

I didnt mean to be rude and like I said before I dont want people to think I dont appreciate crits.
So like I said I ll post them in the lettering area soon too and would be happy if you and others would want to give me a few tips and explain why certain things should not be done =)

[Kep!]

Also, there's a sequential showcase exactly for things like this. Not that I personally care that it's here...but there is a specific forum for the purpose.

[Nic]

I started to write out a reply to you again Kep! but its really not worth it

if you read my previous reply again a little more carefully you should see that your comment was just not really needed either anyways

thanks for the input

[Kep!]

Kid, you've got skin like tissue. You've been given a lot of good advice here...even from us folks who normally are too busy making a living making comics to give it to you...but I did and so have others. Say "thank you" and get back to work at learning the craft if that's what you want to do, but don't teach your grandmother how to knit.

[Nic]

thank you Kep!

[OZ!]

OZ! thanks
I am aware of the fact that my anatomy is not exactly perfect yet I dont think its that terrible either atleast not throughtout the pages
Plus if you concider the crazyness I chosse to exagerate the poses as much as possible not everything spiderman usually does is a very comfortable or realistic pose either yet its ok for him to do it.
I appreciate your comment however since like I said I do know that I still have flaws in my antaomy but if you think that my stuiff is that teribble and looks like I have never seen a human body before is a little hard worded dont you think so cus if that was the case you might aswell do it to pretty much evey second post on this forum.


Thanks

Well, the problem wasn't the fact that they were exaggerated. Exaggeration is easy to spot. The muscles connect wrong, there are bones in places that there shouldn't be bones and in every pose there is at least one broken bone. I am sorry if it sounded harsh but you wouldn't hear it from evolver so I thought I might make it more clear for you. The lack of articulation in both of our critiques had to do with the fact that honestly, there is too much to explain. You need to sit down and relearn what you think you know about anatomy. :slap:

[Nic]

I will try to sit down and relearn anatomy since like I said before I m not saying tha mine is perfect yet
so any explanation I can get is appreciated a lot
but I dont need people to tell me that I have anatmy problems because I know that already

I m not saying I dont want them to do it but I dont need it
I would rather have people telling me what exactly they think it is that I m doing wrong since obviously I am aware that there is something wrong but cant point it out or change it myself

Did I make myself somewhat clear now?

Also I would like to mention that I m not a natvie speaker so maybe sometimes things I write come across differentky that they were origianly intended even if it doesnt sound like the worst piggin english you have ever read =)

I m sorry if people other than Kep! felt offended by the way I was trying to deffend my point of view
I appreciated all the comments and crits I got and will try to improve it

so thanks again =)

[FIG]

Well good effort, I thought it was funny and realized you are lampooning street fighter and superhero comics in general. I can see what everyone is saying about the anatomy and other elements of drawing you need to work on but I also think its nice work and I really like the coloring. I think doing something more serious with classic superhero characters to show people what else you can do is in order but thats just my opinion.

[OZ!]

I will try to sit down and relearn anatomy since like I said before I m not saying tha mine is perfect yet
so any explanation I can get is appreciated a lot
but I dont need people to tell me that I have anatmy problems because I know that already

I m not saying I dont want them to do it but I dont need it
I would rather have people telling me what exactly they think it is that I m doing wrong since obviously I am aware that there is something wrong but cant point it out or change it myself

Did I make myself somewhat clear now?

so thanks again =)

Understood, with that being the case here you go.
Page 1
Panel 1: Fat guy's hand is jacked. The right hand's thumb is missing a joint(or is too short if it is indeed there) and in turn throws off the rest of the hand. On a secondary note, the bulk of muscle on the palm is near the thumb not the opposite side like you have it. So the folds should be on the opposite curve. This is because the bone attaching the thumb to the wrist is the only free moving finger from the start to the end and therefore has that muscle. The fat guy also seems to be lacking a forearm of any kind on his left arm, and his right arm through to his right peck has folds that don't exist in any anatomy.
Your hero, Mr. WOW has some very interesting back muscles that don't exist and his left arm is bulky and muscular while his right arm seems shrunken and kills you attempt to foreshorten his forearm.

Page 2
Panel 1: One of the better panels, your faces are pretty darn good. Problems, when you have massive lats you have...? Massive shoulders as well. As it is his lats don't fit his shoulders and it makes the character look extremely awkward. Hulk is exaggerated, this is wrong.

Panel 2: Big man's collar bones should run into his shoulders but they don't because the shoulders are connected too low, this creates two problems. 1. His arms are measured correctly as to where they should stop on the body but because of the shoulders they are too short and 2. It means you have to make stuff up to try and make it look ok. As it is, the bicep is too low and not long enough, it also seems to twist to the side when it shouldn't, the tricep meets a bone which then meets the elbow( :confused: ?) causing the forearm to lose shape and the rest is history. Your main character's thumb is also on backwards in this frame(unless you had him turn around. If that is the case the reader needs to know)

Panel 3: Once again you lost the second joint on his thumb and this time you broke a few bones on the back of his hand to get it to bend the way it is.

Panel 4-5: Once again, fun faces. :kewl:

Page 3
Panel 1: Once again, right hand has a broken wrist and many missing knuckle caps, the left hand has a broken thumb(it doesn't twist that way), the middle fingers(the technical highlight) sink below the pinky and the index fingers' knuckles and you have yourself another broken hand not to mention a few finger bones that are way too long in comparison to the others. You shouldn't be able to wrap UNDER the bicep and the connection between forearm and bicep is boggling my mind because you are so close to right and yet you decided to add random folds again instead of throwing down the normal curves. :blink:
His chest looks good and his shoulders connect very well. :kewl:
His legs are now the problem and considering they are the big focus, that's a big problem. The quad should always come up above the knee cap in this position(right leg), the knee cap does NOT have an indention in it, even if the cap wasn't there it would not have an indention in it. The shin bone is too short, especially since the forearm is longer. The ball of the foot is too far from the folds of the toes and the ankle bone does not connect to the bottom of the foot. His left leg is broken out of socket or even worse his femur has been shattered to gain that interesting angle(you can avoid these little mishaps by drawing him completely and then adding the shorts after you have worked out the anat)

Otherwise, I really like the coloring and the story is pretty goofy. The art really kills though. You can't stylize your art when you have nothing to stylize. Yes, you were trying to exaggerate stuff, but exaggeration still follows a rhyme and rhythm and without that it doesn't look good. You HAVE to have the basics before you start stylizing your work.

Good luck, I hope to come across your stuff more and more and more and a year from now you'll be kicking some serious ass.

[FeelnMe]

im not trying to take sides, but you draw what you draw out of freedom of expression. people write what they write with that same premise. i bet... that when people say "nice" or "great" or even good job it makes you feel pretty good, but there's no true crit there. so don't get so bent out of shape when people comment negatively and also add nothing. this is a open forum, not everyone is friendly. just keep that in mind when you post. all there really saying is you need more work (right). no big deal.

nice work though. keep it coming!