I could use some critiquing help

[r3deye]

I've started a new comics series called mallow and I've colored the Cover page two different ways. Here is the link http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/56294385/

Any help in opinion would be greatly appreciated.

[James Thorpe]

Do you have a bigger scan of the lineart, you could upload to, say, Photobucket?

I like the art, as far as I can see, it's sort of cute-but-hardass, reminds me of a few of the older Aussie indie comics... Anyway! There's way too much flat white -- the white on Mallow-Man, the gloves, the shoes, the Onion fellow, and even the logo, all make the piece look simply unfinished. I put this down to flatness and lack of detail in the colours -- artists like Mike Mignola have a style that plays well with flats, but I think yours would be better complemented by 'fuller' tone, shading, etc.

"So," you may ask, "How do I give depth and volume to white objects and still make them... white?" Well, this may seem like an odd fit for your style, but check out this pic:
http://warchild13.com/images/images/Mickey%20Mouse.jpg
...I like it. See how Mickey's gloves, and the characters' eyes are rendered, as white objects which have depth. It's not a good idea to start with pure white -- start with a very pale cream/grey/blue-grey, whatever tinge you want it to have; looks like you're aiming for a yellowish tinge with Mallow Man, so go for a cream colour. Now, the shadows/tone can be whatever colour depending on the context, but preferably towards the cooler, blue end of the spectrum, like on the Disney characters' eyes. For much greater depth, use multiple shadow layers (it looks like you're only using one at the moment) -- for example, start with a relatively pale, soft shadow which comes in a fair way from the edge and only vaguely evokes the shape of what you're painting, then a slightly darker one that doesn't spread inward as far and follows the curves of the object more tightly, and maybe a third, darkest, sharpest one, which you use to shade the least-lit areas of the white. I think the smudge and Gaussian blur tools, carefully used in conjunction with the lasso, can be a big help in making sioft shadow areas, although some people don't approve of that, *shrug* Once you've rendered where the white areas get darker, you can focus on where the light is hitting them -- paint in some highlights in the appropriate areas (which depend on where the lighting is, etc), using pure white -- because you started with an off-white base, the highlights will now be nice and visible.

It's pretty much the same process for colouring, er, coloured objects -- a coupla shadow layers, a highlight layer (maybe two if you want a softer highlight area plus some glinting edges). Using too many layers can be a drain on resources, but you can always merge them together once you're happy with an area.

I generally like the flats you've chosen, except I think the black guy's skin is a little too high-saturation and brown -- it's a bit like brown neon, heheh. I'd make his skin a little 'duller' and slightly more pale -- that way you have room in the light spectrum to put shadows and highlights on his skin, and it'll look a little more natural.

By the way, are you using a tablet or a mouse? All the fiddly bits I talk about are -much- easier with a tablet, IMO, but still, people can do good work with a mouse...

Hope you keep at the colouring, man, it's worth it.

[r3deye]

Thanks you very much. That was the most helpful detailed response I've received for that question. I am using a tablet and I will definitely keep coloring!
here is the line art on photobucket: http://i178.photobucket.com/albums/w263/R3DEYE/MMcover.jpg

[James Thorpe]

Cool, hope I've set you on the right foot. :) I'll add you to my DA list, and watch with interest. ;)